Emptying Our Own Baggage


The first time I saw this picture, a while ago, I thought of a committed boyfriend/girlfriend  who “loved you enough”, and “Oh, how sweet…”,
But not so anymore.
Now I think two things.

Sometimes you do need help unpacking, because the item you think is normal and belongs in that psyche of yours, is not normal, and a person, (friend) who is healthier than you can point it out gently.
In love.
…Because they want to see you thrive.
God himself will show you, as you seek His face, read His word, and pray – even journal.

This is an immediate and harsh reaction.

“Sit down in front of your baggage and clean it up yourself.
Don’t saddle some poor schmuck with that mess.”

Friendly thoughts….aren’t they?
Harsh, but necessary, for some who are habitually dependent on others to bail them out.

Growing up, maturing, in an imperfect world, has us at a disadvantage.
We are fallen humans who blow it, raised by fallen humans who blew it, and we end up with broken items in our suitcases/baggage.

But the answer is not in finding another person who “loves you enough…”.
That removes the whole premise of loving.

We cleave to those whom we love because we need them, yes, but they need us too, and our first thought should be,
“How may I bless you, today?”
“How can you help me, today?”

The majority of the time, we really Don’t need someone to help us unpack.

Yes, there are seasons of life when one needs a counselor, but for the most part, it is up to each individual to sit down in front of the luggage that is chock-full of dysfunction, and begin the arduous task of pulling things out on their own, so that one may then, rise up in strength to be a blessing to others whom they draw into relationship with themselves.

I am a firm believer in the fact that we should cultivate our own soul.
»Nourish it.
»Tend it well.
»Prepare it to bear fruit.
»Improve upon our character daily, so that we would be capable of relationship with those who desire a healthy one.
Romance too…

What can we contribute to another’s life?
How can we meet their needs?

That should be our goal.

“Find someone that loves you enough to help you unpack”?
No, my friends…
Leave that to God. He is faithful to send those who are strong enough to contribute health to your life.

Set yourself to unpacking your mess right now, instead of latching onto someone and relying on them to help you do it.

When you find someone you love, you want to have a very light suitcase to fill with memories made by two who took the time to prepare themselves for one another before they ever met.

Something to consider…


8 Replies to “Emptying Our Own Baggage”

  1. The key to being a decent human being, I think, lies in the ability to give others the things they need in order to thrive, while at the same time learning to thrive themselves. The balance teeters on the edge of a knife, and we must give each other grace because none of us can balance the edge for long.

    Learning to let go, and learning to give people the time and room they need to grow while maintaining your own spirit, mind, and body is a lifelong process. Those suitcases hold an awful lot. It takes a great deal of humility and strength and work to become a healthy self, whether one desires to share that self to another person or not.

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